Robben Island

I started today with a smoked crocodile tail sandwich. Number of times I have been able to say that previous to today: zero. Even better? The sandwich was called a "Croc monsieur."

Today we went to Robben Island. It was one of the worst experiences I have ever had as a tourist.

Robben Island is where the prison is that held the political prisoners of Apartheid, including Nelson Mandela. Especially Nelson Mandela. 

Side-note: Mandela is a deity here. Pictures of him and quotes of his and celebrations of his forthcoming birthday are everywhere. He's on posters and T-shirts and coffee mugs and shot glasses and table clothes and postcards and rugs and window clings and rugby balls. Based on what I've seen he's inaugurated every building in the city.

Look, I understand the history. It's just that there comes a point when it begins to seem like propaganda. I don't think propaganda discriminates based on whether you agree with the message or not; propaganda is an overwhelming one-sided sensory overload celebrating a particular point of view. That is what Mandela is. 

This is relevant to the story.

The dock at which you catch the ferry to Robben Island is at the Waterfront, a beautiful modern display of shops and restaurants. There is a visitors center where you go to line up to get on the ferry, etc. The visitors center has a gift shop. The gift shop was the first sign of trouble.

Robben Island is not a happy place and it does not have a happy history. It was the home of thousands of enemies of Apartheid who sacrificed their freedom in an effort to combat injustice. It has become a symbol of (as the gift shop's own merchandise states) the "triumph of the human spirit", or something like that.

I am not completely sure of the wording of the phrase. I would be completely sure if I had bought a calendar, magnet, bookmark, water bottle, necklace pendant, or picture frame with it inscribed, however. Luckily the gift shop sold them all!

In my view, the best item was a chess set. The Robben Island Political Chess Set. You got it: the whites against the blacks. Mandela as king, fist raised. Nothing like teaching the kids to appreciate history, right?

Downstairs as you wait to board the ferry you stand next to a large display explaining to you how horrible life at Robben Island was. This is a quote: "Prison conditions were hard. Treatment of prisoners inhumane....Political prisoners embarked on hunger strikes that pressured the prison authorities to introduce changes."

Hey Ma, can I get that on a T-shirt?!

Professional baseball teams use ridiculous gimmicks to bring fans to the park: T-shirt tosses, mascot races, stupid games, loud obnoxious music, the Dance Cam, etc. Though I hate these gimmicks with a passion, I understand from a business standpoint that teams need to make money (theoretically to sign good players to make the team successful, but that is for another time). Despite its status as a UNESCO World Heritage Site, a designation for which I would guess it receives funding, I am sure whoever runs Robben Island needs to make money to pay the guides and maintenance and whatnot, sure. 

But people would come anyway even if you doubled the price of admission. That would obviate the need to sell all the crap.

When you board the ferry there is a guy standing there urging families to walk the ramp together and pause long enough so that he can take your picture to sell to you when you get back. 95% of the people stopped and beamed at the camera for the shot. Fun family vacation! Okay kids, let's go learn about oppression! Hooray!

Once we got to the island we rode on a rushed bus tour  and dropped at the prison building. About a hundred of us (way too large) were lead around by a former prisoner who seemed to have little interest in his own incredibly scripted presentation. His phone rang three times while he himself was speaking; he even answered it once! During his own tour. I cannot emphasize this enough.

This is a bit chicken or the egg, I admit, but the audience couldn't care less about what the guy said. Here we have an actual former prisoner telling us about his time spent on the island and the priority was getting a picture of your buddy flashing a peace sign in front of Mandela's cell?

It took about five minutes for me to want to leave as soon as possible. Fortunately the MO of the tour guide was to rush us through as quickly as he was able. We ended up spending more time on the ferry (an hour and a half) than on the tour (less than an hour). 

The bit about Mandela was relevant because I am convinced that if Mandela's name were not able to be associated with the prison nobody would visit. The guide mentioned Mandela dozens of times. The phrase "Mandela and others" was stuck into every possible context. It's clear he is the moneymaker. Hardly any other names were mentioned.

With the incredible history at that island and the world-changing events that occurred there, the potential for education is obviously boundless. The fact that the events in question are so recent relative to "other history" increases its potential by a huge factor. The people who were imprisoned there are still living! Giving tours! This country is still dealing with the consequences of the actions that occurred here and there are important lessons to be learned. Stop screwing it up, already!

A couple years ago Mom and I went on a tour of Eastern State Penitentiary in Philadelphia. More respect was paid on that tour to the perpetrators of actual crimes like murder and rape than was paid to the political prisoners of Robben Island. The Robben Island Museum and tour is a complete joke and a disservice.

Tomorrow, if the weather holds up, I will paraglide off of Table Mountain. Then the next day I will hike back up.